27 June 2009

only in america...

only in america could an untimely death and a few catchy tunes get someone off the hook for being a repeat offending child molester.

only in america could two selfish fuckfaces blessed with eight little miracles exploit the shit out of their kids and themselves and still go on television in an attempt to elicit my sympathies because they fucked up their lives.

only in america could spencer and heidi exist.

only in america could a 300 pound, washed up, offensive scheme killing, headline grabbing center steal draft day from guys that are actually still talented(blake griffin, tyler hansbrough)

only in america could michael bay robot movies get sequels.

only in america could we complain about rigged elections in other parts of the world while turning our backs on our own(twice!)

only in america could i say fuck you to all the people involved in the previous statements.

and only in america could i be talking to the man in the mirror and know that he is better that all these other fucks out there.

6 comments:

Michael Maier said...

You sicken me, you fucking racist Hater-Ade drinker.

troy myers said...

how the hell is that racist? i feel as if i hate everybody pretty much equally.

Mike Scott II said...

That's right you do hate everyone pretty much tepidly...I mean equally. Racist? Just because someone isn't doing a teary-eyed rendition of the "Whhhyyyyy?" part in Human Nature they must be racist.

Heavy-handed (and ill-conceived) writing much? I mean..."eight little miracles"? Seriously? Loading yourself up with fertility drugs and having a bunch of kids isn't exactly a miracle. Science-fiction, at best. Besides..."only in America"? What, you never heard of these Von Trapp family singers? They're like the next Jonas.

..and untimely? Stuff me full of tranqs and plastic each and every day and I'll be lucky to see 40. Naw, it was pretty much past-due. Besides, don't you own a copy of Repulsion? Whether or not you think MJ did it...let's be realistic here. Roman Polanski did.

Yes, because Michael Bay sequels are so much worse than giant robot anime with (literally)20+ sequels....only in America?

troy myers said...

mike scott...always good for bringing a few oranges to the apple party...

first, i don't care how jon and kate got their kids, they have them...i just don't like the idea of putting them in the public eye. fame at an early age can fuck a child up(see: the one gloved wonder) but even beyond that, my real problem with them is the fact that after their time in the public eye, after their proximity to the fire has left them feeling burned, they have the nerve to go on television and plead for the american public's sympathy. fuck them, they did it to themselves and to their little miracles, which as trite as it may sound, all children are.

the von trapp's never took out an hour long infomercial to complain about the trappings of fame.

and as for roman polanski...i can't hate him because when i was 19, i dated a 17 year old too, so technically i'm in the same statutory boat he is.

watch the documetary, roman and the girl had a consensual relationship which happened to be seized upon by an overzealous legal system...jacko was sued by parents and paid millions of dollars(twice) to keep his shit out of jail because he knew he did it and he knew that as a famous person of the time that he could get away with it a la o.j.

the difference boils down to the fact that polanski was a wannabe robert evans at best, a jerry lee lewis clone at worst. jacko, on the other hand, was jackie earl haley from little children, a scary predator going after kids far too young to make consensual decisions...

small differences, i'm sure...but important ones to make, especially in light of the hero worship that seems to be surrounding his sudden death.

and bonus: who the fuck even watches anime? and do the opinions of those who have never been laid really matter anyways...i'm talking "popular" culture here.

Michael Maier said...

And you drugged and raped your 17 year old too?

(My 6/29 post was completely sarcastic.)

Jason L. Maier said...

Troy you have got to check this out...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_9vy1guTcg

Good stuff...